Like Austrian-built American minivans used for ill-advised trans-European roadtrips? No? Well, we put one on a shirt anyway.

This shirt hopes to capture how you feel when your whole fleet of crapboxes is inflated and plated, finally.

The cheapest new EV $930 can buy, all 1.1 horsepower of it.

Here it is, David's personal mantra, in shirt form.

Advice for all our Tatra fans, prior to you wrecking yourselves.

Whether you're K-Car or Kei car, you're OK in our book.

Put it in H! I bet you know what this is referencing, in a completely safe and non-trademark infringing way.

Having a handy chart of the evolution of U.S.-market VW Beetle turn signals will prove to be invaluable. Seriously, this shirt is a literal lifesafer. It probably should be required to buy, legally.

If you need more than 50 horsepower to drive, do you even really know how to drive?

Manuals are just better. You do the math.

You know you're just dying to talk to some poor normie about the weirdness of a DKW two-stroke three, right?

The Inflated and Plated logo shirt! What better way can you think of to get people to ask you 'hey, what's that on your shirt mean?' and then wander away, disinterested, moments later?

It's one of those shirts with the words and the ampersands, but this one is about the Otto cycle and is, you know, a little bit dirty-sounding.

If you're good on shirts, you could always buy this book, Robot, Take the Wheel about cars and the future of autonomous cars! I guess you could use it as a shirt, too, if you had to.